Being empathic can be a struggle in several ways. It's difficult to process all of the things going on around us all at once.
Depending on our living situation, Empaths can be at total peace at home and then once we go out into the world we get bombarded with this frenzy of emotions. It’s overwhelming. Anxiety starts to consume us, our heads start to ache, we feel sick, and panic can start to ensue. We feel everything and more often than not it hurts. It feels like being the target at a firing range.
Often times, without even knowing what we're doing we start putting up our energetic shields and put on our energetic armor. We build a fortress around us and try to become impenetrable. There’s no getting through our thick walls.
We can become detached and emotionally disconnected. Shut off and shut down.
This is not exactly a recommended method of self-help for Empaths, it's a coping mechanism and while it works for the most part, it’s not ideal or a long term solution. Plus it’s also exhausting.
"Empathetic people - dreamers and idealists - have this sort of accidental power. Most spend their early years ridden with self-doubt, insecurity, and people pleasing habits. But their journey is inevitably derailed when this comfortable life gets uprooted by an unexpected darkness. Suddenly their trusted methods no longer seem to bring them happiness. At first this depression convinces them that thy might never feel joyful again. But ultimately, it sets them on a quest for something more - for love, justice, and wisdom. Once this adventure begins, there is no stopping a dreamer. And when dreamers unite? Well, that's how we start to change the world." Unknown
Self-Help for Empaths the Quintessential Key:
Many Empaths are under the mistaken belief that we are taking on the pain and emotions of others as our own. Many Empaths will be put off by this statement because there is no denying what we feel is real. It is, but that stuff is not ours. Do you see how disempowering it is to walk around thinking you are a victim to everyone else's stuff?
We're always trying to get people to feel better, to look at the bright side. Why? Because, we want to feel better around those that are feeling negative emotions. We're trying to create harmony. We prefer basking in pure positive emotion. Who doesn't? When we run up against something unpleasant our instinct is to take care of it. So we start cleaning the gutters. But often time we find ourselves covered in muck.
Observe other people's stuff don't absorb it! Let people feel how they are feeling. Don't try to fix it. If they are in pain, they are entitled to feel it. Don't invalidate their feelings. Let them go through their process. It's not yours and it's not your responsibility. They need to feel in order to heal. You don't need them to feel different in order for you to feel different. Make feeling good yourself your priority. That way they can raise their emotions to meet yours and not the other way around.
Self-Help for Empaths the Doorway to Freedom:
Simple awareness can keep you from drowning in muck. When you walk into an environment where there seems to be an energetic free-for-all and you feel like you've got arrows being shot at you from all directions, come back to attention. Breathe. Remember that even though you can sense and feel everything that is going on, it's not yours. You'll be out of there soon. If it follows you home - ask the question who does this belong to? You'll find it often lightens or dissipates. You might even get an answer as to whose it is.
Many people advise to project a shield or block the energies out. While we can certainly do that, the effort and concentration it takes to shield yourself at a store, a sporting event, concert, or an airport is depleting. Whereas, if we were to project the force and size of that kind of shield inward it would be energizing. Doing this strengthens our connection to our own emotional guidance system.
Self-Help for Empaths Best Head Clearing Tip:
Nature is in harmony. Visit with nature frequently. The noise in your head will dissipate and you won’t feel everyone’s stuff. Put your feet in the grass; bury them in sand, dirt, or snow - this grounds your electrical field and brings you back into balance. Surround yourself in flowers or by trees. If you live in a concrete jungle, bring nature inside. Buy plants. Put up nature scenes. Connect with an animal. Get in the water, it’s a great energy cleanse. Drink more water.
Self-Help for Empaths Crucial Need:
Empaths need more rest and downtime than most. When we're asleep we withdraw are consciousness back to the source of harmony. We need that reconnection with peace as often and long as we can. We cannot sleep without first taking the time to unwind and unravel the onslaught of energy we encountered on any given day. Our getting ready for bed rituals can take hours. It is important to untangle yourself as much as you can from other energy fields before bed in order to get a good nights rest.
Self-Help for Empaths Relationship Survival Tip:
Being in relationships of any kind is constantly fatiguing, plus we have a knack for attracting energy vampires. We need time to ourselves in order to reset and relax back into our own energy fields. This requires us to raise a big neon “Do Not Disturb” billboard to our friends and loved ones. Depending on various factors like length of exposure, what we were exposed to, and frequency of exposure in between being able to reset again, we may need anywhere from a couple hours to ourselves to a couple weeks or more. Take care of yourself make your health your top priority: decline obligations, avoid negative stimulation when possible; shut off your phone; create space; get your own room or living situation.
Self-Help for Empaths Acceptance Tip:
You can read, feel, and sense energy. Fact. Love yourself enough not to suppress or diminish who you really are. Trust yourself enough to know that your knowing about a person or a situation is true. Use this skill to your advantage.
Being sensitive is not a character flaw. Honor your feelings, even if they aren't yours they are still real. Do not be ashamed of showing your feelings no matter how ridiculous they may seem. They're not going anywhere and they must be processed. Do not dim your light in order to match someone else's. Crank up the dimmer switch and make them match yours. Shine on.
For more help processing negative emotions check out my article on Alternative Methods to Dealing with Anxiety.
Also helpful: 11 Ways to Ground Yourself by Teal Swan